Dogs Anonymous: The Online Support Group for Struggling Pet Owners
A safe space for dog owners to share frustrations and find community support.
1A unique support system
Dogs Anonymous provides a Zoom-based support group where pet owners can openly discuss their frustrations with difficult dogs. Founded in 2025, the nonprofit combines animal behavior expertise with emotional support, modeled after 12-step recovery programs. Weekly meetings attract diverse participants including first-time owners, foster caregivers, and even professional trainers from across the US and internationally. The group's core principle is anonymity, creating a judgment-free zone where members can share struggles they'd never discuss publicly.
2The shame of difficult dogs
Many participants report intense shame about their dogs' behavioral issues, particularly women who feel judged for not having 'perfect' pets. A Pets journal study found 53% of owners with problem dogs feel alone, while 78% experience significant caregiver burden. Members describe how their dogs' reactivity threatens their sense of belonging or makes them appear incapable. The fictional TV dog Lassie represents an unattainable ideal that exacerbates these feelings, especially for Gen X and millennial owners who grew up with that media representation.
3Behavioral challenges addressed
The group primarily deals with dog reactivity - the most common issue owners face. A 2026 University of Lincoln study categorized these behaviors into oral attacks, frustration, and posturing, with lunging and barking being most frequent. Members share experiences with demand barking, resource guarding, and anxiety-driven aggression. One attendee described her boxer becoming unsettled after family changes including another dog's death and fostering a new pet. The meetings provide strategies for anticipating triggers while acknowledging the emotional toll of constant vigilance.
4Founders' recovery-inspired approach
Co-founder Jerri Scherff, drawing from 13 years of sobriety, incorporated AA traditions into Dogs Anonymous. The program emphasizes sharing 'experience, strength and hope' to create repeatable, sustainable support. Unlike typical pet advice forums, DA focuses on owner wellbeing first - a radical approach in pet care. Co-founder Daphne Mendoza-Tervanis, with 15 years in the industry, notes how current systems prioritize dogs over people, leaving owners unsupported when reality doesn't match expectations.
5Financial and social barriers
The group addresses growing inaccessibility of professional help, with private trainers in Los Angeles charging up to $300/hour. Meanwhile, social media creates unrealistic standards through curated 'petfluencer' accounts like @_violasnow (5.8M followers) and @tikatheiggy. These pressures compound owners' feelings of inadequacy. DA removes financial barriers by operating on a donation basis, asking 'how are you feeling?' rather than 'how much can you pay?' when owners seek help during behavioral crises.
6Diverse meeting topics
Weekly discussions range from serious topics like euthanasia to lighthearted moments about dogs' peculiar habits. Some sessions focus on specific anxieties while others become general venting spaces. The variety reflects members' evolving needs - one meeting might analyze shame dynamics, while another shares stories of dogs eating money and tampons. This flexibility creates organic support that adapts to what the community needs most each week.
7Personal transformation stories
Members describe profound shifts in their relationships with their dogs. A New Orleans owner shared how reactivity training left her emotionally exhausted until finding DA. The group helps people 'grieve the dog you thought you'd have' while bonding with their actual pet. Co-founder Scherff found solace in meetings after her American bulldog's death, valuing the privacy away from her 283,000 Instagram followers. These stories demonstrate how DA facilitates emotional processing beyond basic training advice.
8Creating sanctuary online
In an often-toxic digital landscape, Dogs Anonymous offers rare authentic connection. Founders intentionally keep 'outside noise' out, allowing raw expressions like 'I fucking hate my dog today' without judgment. Puerto Rican attendees appreciate finding light in the internet's darkness. By combining behavioral science with emotional support, DA addresses the full spectrum of pet ownership challenges - making it a vital resource as adoption rates rise (2M shelter dogs in 2025) while support systems lag behind.
Original article: Wired — Dogs Anonymous: The Online Support Group for Struggling Pet Owners