The Science of Relational Identity
Your personality is not a fixed trait but a fluid, context-dependent social construct.
1Identity as a Relational Construct
Lisa Feldman Barrett, a psychology professor at Northeastern University, argues that human identity is not fixed. Instead of possessing inherent, immovable traits, individuals exist in relation to specific conditions and social environments. This scientific perspective challenges the common subjective belief that our personalities remain consistent regardless of our physical or social surroundings.
2Contextual Nature of Personality
Traits like extroversion are highly situated rather than permanent. A person might feel extroverted among familiar friends while appearing introverted when hungry or surrounded by strangers. According to relational realism, we are not the sole authors of our identities because our behavior fluctuates significantly based on the immediate context of our experiences.
3The Meaning-Making Brain
The human brain functions by creating action plans based on past statistical patterns, a process Barrett calls meaning-making. This predictive mechanism operates largely outside our conscious awareness, constantly interpreting signals from our bodies and the external world. Every action we take, including questioning our own identity, is a product of this fluctuating system.
4Social Influence on Self
Because identity emerges from interactions, other people play a direct role in shaping who we are. Our brains process social cues to make sense of the world, meaning our companions influence our momentary state. We are not isolated entities; we are interconnected participants in a shared process of defining one another's identities.
5Responsibility in Social Dynamics
This scientific framework suggests we hold significant responsibility for the identities of those around us. Since our presence influences how others perceive and act, our interactions carry weight. Recognizing this mutual influence allows individuals to approach social relationships with greater intention, acknowledging that we are active participants in shaping others' realities.
6Curating Your Social Environment
Barrett advises that one way to exert control over our identity is to be deliberate about our social circles. By seeking out people who encourage our best versions, we can influence the context in which our brains perform meaning-making. Choosing supportive environments is a practical strategy for fostering personal growth and well-being.
7Challenging Subjective Convictions
The concept of relational realism often feels counterintuitive because it contradicts our internal sense of a stable self. However, scientific evidence indicates that our perception of fixed traits is merely a descriptive tool rather than a biological reality. Moving beyond these convictions requires adjusting our vantage point on how we define ourselves.
8Implications for Personal Growth
Understanding that identity is fluid provides a pathway for change. By shifting the focus from fixed traits to situational interactions, individuals can challenge their own perceptions. This research, featured in the Big Think series, encourages people to rethink their convictions and actively expand their thinking to foster a more flexible self-concept.
Original article: Big Think — The Science of Relational Identity